I never realized how many folks were reading this until I didn’t write anything for a few days. As I write this I am eating my latest snack favorite; kettle corn (single serving size) with a fall mix of peanuts, candy corn and m&M’s. Yummy!!
Thursday, the room fairies came and cleaned, purged and organized the Princesses’ room. Room looks great and she has kept it that way for 4 whole days. Dr appointment was Thursday, she agreed the tone was intense. She gave me a cortisone shot to help in the shoulder and added a second muscle relaxer. I am taking so many meds. Worries me a bit but some are a necessity.
Friday, I worked on some outlines for the sermons and did some reading. But found I was really tired. Can’t wait for the energy to increase. The gang went to the football game Friday. Watched the home team beat the neighboring team soundly 56-16. They even had the jv team playing.
Saturday a.m. Ron went to clean the church at 1 a.m. as they had 5th quarter which is a gathering of kids after home games. He then drove the girls softball team to a tournament in North Callaway. The girls came in 3rd. But it made it a hard day here.
It was Heritage Days here. This is a big event here in Bowling Green. There is a parade, booths, cute baby contest, toy tractor pulls, and a car show. The Methodist Church does a free breakfast. I took the kids down, it is within walking distance. Bought wore me out. Kids were bummed they couldn’t go to the event. Although Brandon was able to be in the parade with the soccer league. Princess really wanted to go but I was not comfortable with her going down. I always have a fear she might run into the bio family.
I realized that I am not up to being alone with them for a whole day. Felt a bit inadequate. Kids were great though. Princess was asking a lot of questions. I reassured her that even though the parents weren’t signed yet she was our daughter. She was stuck with us when she was good or bad. She was ours. We decided on her new middle name which is a form of Elizabeth which translates as a gift from God. It will be Lizabetta. She seemed to calm down. There is a deep fear that if I’m not good they will get rid of me. Told her she is stuck until she is 18. She laughed. Maybe this will be a turnaround.
Today, Sunday, was a great day. Tone was high and I was a bit wobbly. The 2nd muscle relaxer might be too much on a Sunday. I loved the first sermon of the sermon series. I did it as a power point. Today’s was “Who is the Church?”. Next week is “What is the Church?” I feel a renewed energy and drive when I am preaching. God’s spirit is moving. I am praying it moves within the congregation. Plus we had our fish fry at New Harmony. Love that event. They even did some fish for me with just corn meal. Was delicious. I was wiped out afterwards. Ron and I came home to take a short nap. Four hours later we were awake. The kids were phenomenal.
Moving to Missouri was the scariest thing in the world for Ron and I. But we can say it has been the greatest thing for us. It has improved our marriage, increased our family and deepened our faith. Sometimes we are homesick but we look at the relationships we have formed. Being in ministry friendships can be difficult but the ones we do have we cherish. We may not have our family but we have been adopted by several families.
In many ways I isolate myself. Be it to protect myself or just at times who I am. But it is all OK. I am comfortable with who I am. And who I am is being changed and transformed through this stroke process. I have had serious strokes. My strokes are not like any one else’s strokes. I am not a stroke victim but a stroke survivor. I would not be this far if not for the prayers and support of so many. I am not under any delusion that if not for my faith I would not be as well as I am.
I still have trying moments where I am not where I should be yet. Or worried I am not recovering fast enough. But it will take time. November see the neurologist and we will look into what to do about the tone. In the meantime will keeping doing the therapy, someone suggested massage therapy.
Seahawk won there game. Ron is happy, happy, happy.
Busy week this week. Meeting tomorrow with the Baptist Church pastor in Louisiana, Rotary Tuesday with the church fundraising meeting that evening, Wednesday is clergy cluster meeting in Hannibal and Thursday is Bowling Green Ministerial Association. Will see how much of that I can handle.
Wanting to start purging my clothes. That may be a project that will last a few days over time. I think I may look that less is more and things change over time.
I may be in pain, I may not be able to run, I may not have fine motor movements but what I do have my faith; that grows deeper and is moving me in new and amazing ways, a husband; who loves me and is my helpmate and who is amazing, children; all ages, all aspects, they show me love and support, make me laugh and am so proud if them. I have a home, a jobs (which is more than a job), friends and an area I have fallen in live with.
I am blessed.
Dearest Abba, thank you, thank you, thank you. I am blessed with more than I can ever imagine. I may not be rich but I am rich in your love and guidance. Your grace is abundant and I am humbled. Amen