1:24 a.m. and yes I am very very sleepy. But I also am coughing until it hurts. I am wheezing like I am a 5 pack a day smoker who has walked up 12 flights of stairs. I have taken cold medicine, I have taken cough syrup, I have taken my inhaler, I have drank hot tea with lemon and honey,I have taken a hot shower, I have tried Vicks vapor rub, and have sucked on cough drops. My stomach, ribs and throat are sore. I am sleeping in the recliner to be propped up and so Ron can sleep. At times I have coughed so long and hard I have lost my breath and other times thought I would choke to death.
Today I prayed I would not have one of these coughing fits while I preached. God answered my prayer. As soon as I walked into the house after the boards meeting I was double over coughing. Note to you who might have a stroke in the future: you cannot, I repeat cannot, walk and cough at the same time. If you attempt this feat the results could be 1) running into things, 2) falling down or 3) a combination of both. Which results in embarrassment and pain and a peals of laughter from your children depending on how and where you land.
Preached today on physical and spiritual hunger. Love it when the Spirit moves you during a sermon and you can feel something happening or watch a transformation take place. Since this Lenten season I feel a renewal within me which has given me a different insight. I think it also has to do with my mentor, with the class I am taking through the Center on Women’s Ministry on coming to terms with your past, and realizing that I am not going to be perfect, that I have freed a lot of myself. It’s kinda cool. I can be a 48 year old nearly 49 year old who is a bit of a goof with her own unique fashion sense with a warped sensed of humor, a funkified past, an assortment of children from 40 to 4 and be glad for everything that has happened to me.
Yes I did say Everything. If it weren’t for Everything…I would not have been a young mommy,and wife; I would not have met my beloved, become closer to him through tragedy and trials, I would not have gone into ministry, I would not have moved, I would not have fostered, I would not have adopted, and through the last few years I would not have learned my strength as now a worldly orphan after my mother’s death or my humility as a double stroke survivor. I would never have learned how truly truly strong my patience, will power (Ron call it stubbornness) and my faith is as I have learned from these circumstances.
I am not a weakling. And it is OK and alright to ask for help. With me having Grace now, my Independence around town is helping my self confidence. I feel kinda cool. Hee hee.
OK sleep is winning …maybe this will be it.
Baby Hubcap had a meltdown going to bed. Once he calmed down, he sat on my lap and we cuddled. I asked him what good dreams he wanted to have during his sleep; He wanted butterflies, flowers, rainbows, Ironman, Batman and the Hawk. Now my job was to weave that for him. So he would feel safe. Oh yes, and he didn’t want the Zombies to come in scare him. You all figure out your own stories but ours was a very cool. It encouraged him to go to the land of Nod.
I think I will join Hubcap in his dreamscape.
Love and blessings to you all.
P.S. it helps when you write something at strange hours to actually send it through and also edit it and get rid of all the jibberish.