Have you ever had one of those days where nothing absolutely nothing goes right? Those days you wish you could hit the rewind button and start over. I bet everyone does at some point.
Today is that day for me. A day of Murphy’s law. A day of dismay. A day of why me and what could be next. A day of mishaps and memory slips.
It all began with a night of strange dreams with crocodiles under the bed attacking me. This caused me to jolt awake. Then before my beloved woke me up, I had a dream of giving birth (another impossibility) to a baby boy who could already talk and had four teeth. People came to study him. My quandary in this dream was to name this child a name I could remember. In hindsight since he talked I should have had him pick his own name. Duh.
I rouse the Princess to get ready. I begin to get ready when I discover the makeup fairy had transported my makeup to the Princess’ room. It is amazing how that happens.
Princess pours her cereal to the tip top of her bowl. I ask her to empty some back and turn to see her face in the bowl eating it to make room for milk. She then pours herself a glass of milk deems it to full and dumps most of it in the sink.
The Teen is not awake. I wake him up as it later than he normally gets up. He looks at me with dismay and frustration.
“Why didn’t anyone wake me up!”
Let me get this straight, you are 15 years old with an alarm clock right beside you and you are asking me, why didn’t we wake you up. Really, dude, really! But he is awake and moving right? Nope he dozes back off and once again I awaken him.
I go upstairs to make his eggs and pack his lunch. That goes well. No cuts and no bruises. But as I sit here, I wonder if I turned off the burner. The Teen begins torturing Princess and out of her mouth come this high pitched glass breaking scream. Whereas The Teen responds with, “My job is done,I am going to school.” And off he waltzes.
I have a success in getting Princess to school. Yay me. Traffic was in my favor, the drop off circle was not crowded and their was no hesitation in line to get rid (oops meant painfully depart) of our little darlings.
I head to my office to do a bit of work and gather my paycheck. Simple tasks. Go through side door, go through secretary office to my office. I use my key and settle into my chair. Mother Nature’s call beckoned me to the restroom. After I finished her calling, I headed back to the offices.
The secretary’s door is shut. I forgot to turn the little knob loose so the door is open. My outside office door is locked. I just locked myself out of the offices. My keys and cellphone are inside but I am outside.
I assume and we know what happens when you assume (if you don’t know, I bet there are several people willing to tell you). Anyway I assumed my secretary will be in so I waited and waited and waited. 60 minutes goes by and this is not looking good. I have a 10 o’clock meeting with the insurance adjuster. I finally break down and call a rock of the church to help. She arrives as rapidly as she can.
I am a bit sheepish and embarrassed. She chuckles and opens the door. I keep on saying thank you. I get into my office and see if I don’t head out soon I am going to miss the meeting.
I go out to my car and think it’s all easy peasy from here on it. I put my key in the car. It won’t turnover again. I leave Ron a voice-mail. I call the agent and cancel the meeting and reschedule it for Monday.
I return to my office and decide I might as well work. The phone rings. Technically it is my day off. But I answer to a very angry man wanting $40 dollars for food and “stuff” so he can get back to Texas. I explain I can’t help “George” but we can try to find out who can. I through out some suggestions and he throws out profanity at each one. He asked me, “Why the damn hell don’t you know nuffin.” I calmly (and barely) tell him that I am still learning things as I have been here a short time. He humphs and hangs up.
I await for the beloved white knight to come rescue me. I find out he had a schedule and rescuing me wasn’t in that. We decide to leave the car, do the banking and run his errand. We leave to do the banking. Afterward we will grab lunch and head to Shelley. I realize that I don’t have my phone. So we veer back to the church. I go and unlock the door and go to my office and then realize that I had my phone the whole time. It was in my sweatshirt pocket.Grrrr
We go to gas and decide to grab gas station food. We grab quickly. Once in the car, I take a huge bite of my tornado and it is bloody hot. What I thought as I quickly grabbed it to be hamburger and cheese was habernaro and cheese. Burn baby burn.
And my friends this was all before noon.
Time for the second half of the day. Don’t you wonder what will happen next.